That final step ...

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I'm kind of a shy guy. I've known this girl for 3 years now. At first she really just someone I knew, was friends with and we occasionally teamed up for assignments. Then she went to study in Spain for 6 months which was an unexpected disaster for me. I missed her like crazy, etc. Now she's back and thank god she hasn't hooked with some spaniard.

She has been back for a few weeks and I have been with her almost every evening. She calls me to go do dinner, I call her to go to the movies, I sit at her place til 3.00am, she sits at my. We have fun, I make her laugh ( she is really easy) and she has told me intimate things about her life you don't just share with anyone.

This isn't actually a 'does she like me' question. I know she does because she has once said so to one of my friends, but that was a year ago. I do like her and want for our relationship to become more. But I can't really get it done. Before every meeting I plan what to do: if we go to the movies, I put my hand on her leg, if she sits like that I do that, if she says that I do that... However none of my carefully laid plans ever work because I am either too shy or she doesn't do any of the things I had planned for. Friends have advised me to just try and kiss her, but she is really shy and I just know that would startle her too much and backfire. What is a good thing to do or say to break it to her subtly?I'd really hate it that we don't end up together because I do something goofy. Advice
You and she are shy. This makes it tough.

But, as tough as it may be, you will need to find the courage to get the message to her. I don't recommend plotting out ways to touch her leg or the such.

Instead, my advice is that you casually tell her that you are "developing feelings" for her. If she is too shy to come right out and tell you how she feels then say that you would like to know how she feels.

This is not goofy, it is simply talking out what's on your mind (and her's too).

Good luck! George

-- from George
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