I still love him after 20 years
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I was 10 years old when I met the man I would love for the rest of my life. It was instant. We became friends, then best friends. In our late teens we became really close. It was very obvious what I felt for him and I couldn't hide it. I was always afraid to tell him what I felt because of our friendship. A mutual friend asked us both the same question and the answer was the same, we didn't want to ruin our friendship. When I was 18 and he was 21 we got really close secretly. At this time I told him exactly what I felt for him. He expressed the same for me. He even went as far as telling him father that I was the woman he wanted to marry. Shortly after that night he asked me out. From what I can now only describe as fear I said no and made up some excuse. That night he went out anyway and met the woman that would later become his first wife. His wedding day was the most devastating day of my life. I asked him right before he went to the ceremony if he loved her and he couldn't answer me. He just said, you don't understand. I started a 7 year horrible relationship. During that time I lost communication with him, mainly out of respect for our separate relationships. I would see him occasionally during holidays (his parents and I are very close). During that time, I lost my best friend anyway because his wife and I didn't see eye to eye, which is to say we couldn't stand each other. For those 7 years I thought of him daily. Both our relationships ended around the same time. He got a divorce and I broke up with my ex. We went out, as friends, a couple of times and it was like time had not passed. We would talk for hours. He dated numerous women after his divorce and I recoved from my very damaging relationship. In our time apart I gained about 100 lbs so my confidence level is shot. It's been about 5 years from his divorce and now he is remarried. I, too, am in a new relationship. The problem is, I haven't stopped loving him, not for one day. I love him and dream about him every single day of my life. I will be 31 next week and I'm going crazy realizing that my life is passing by without him. I want him to know that I still care about him. I know that he didn't marry for love, yet again. I don't love the man I'm with. We are both with other people out of convinience. We recently saw each other and I could feel the connection and chemistry between us. What should I do? I'm a holding on to an impossible dream??? I don't want to hurt no more. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone else in my life. Is there any possibility??? Should I tell him how I feel? Does he think it was just a teenage thing? What should I do?
My advice is to tell him you still love him.
It will make you feel better and it should please him.
The world would be a better place if more people said "I love you."
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com